Well Water

I read this piece the other day and could have sworn I commented, but I see I did not.. ugh I'm getting old!

Ok so I want to say that I really love the creative angles in this piece, you have a gift of swishy and splashy in your poetry... love the fun words you used, hence is why I made fun words in my comment ;p

The sadness and depth of emotions touches my heart on a level that I too can relate... and so you brought this piece alive with creativity, but then you also made me teary... now thats a powerful piece in my opinion!!

All right, let me see how should I start,

I like what you are doing, the beginning works.

your words are shaped like buckets, <--

so you are immediately telling the reader you are the well, and this someone throws the bucket in you to get water from the well, and since I know what color your eyes are, I'm drawn to believe the green bricked well are your eyes.

Its unfortunate - <-- I think it should be It's.

verbal insults weaken your capability to carry the weight.

^ this part right here, seem a bit odd to me. In the sense, that I'm picturing the buckets still, so this someone starts saying verbal insults and let's say you start crying, the well fills with water, and it's too much that this someone can't handle the weight in the buckets he/she threw.

Splish Splash - the water fill the buckets.

They're overflowing <-- my question is who is overflowing? the verbal insults or the water in your eyes, (well) per se...

I am going to interpret it as your tears are overflowing, and this someone remains dry and hasn't noticed that he/she is hurting you, Now that's what confuses me as I thought this someone must had realized what she/he was doing when he/she threw verbal insults.. words like buckets in the well -- I mean it's foreseeable that when someone throws a bucket into a well, it's to get water... so then you tell this someone remove your blinders for this should not be what you thirst for <-- now take a look and see me, I don't think this is what you want, unclear water... my question is how did the water got unclean -- my answer will be by the verbal insults.

now, my only concern is the use of blinders <- those are I think used on horses, so they won't see from side to side, and when I read it, I immediately pictured that someone as a horse lol, then I thought it could be someone who rides a horse, who went and threw a bucket on the well, to give the water to his thirsty horse.

so then, what shall you do when liquid flows no more and these wells <--- now noticed overhere you are using wells, while up there you used only one well...so you shifted, and it can make a reader confuse... wasn't only one well? where did the others came from? ( p.s. the use of wells double hinted me to believe those are your eyes, but i think is best to just stick to one well)

So the last question makes me think that you are saying: one day I will dry up and I won't cry and I will move on, and I won't be here. So who will satiate your thirst... as if you are wonder, what will you do? how will you feel?

Interesting poem, I can continue writing but I think I cover what I wanted to say. This may not be what I thought, but it sure made my imagination work.

-splish-

-splash-

- I love when you do little things like this in your poems. Just makes them so much more eye catching and gives it an extra wow factor and uniqueness.

Deep poem, although short, it delivered your emotions and thoughts about this person and what they do to you. But you believe sooner or later they will end up being hurt themselves and will have no one else to turn to.

Nice little short one from you - I liked it.

I love this Chelsey, although there is a deep sadness in the lines there is also a strength and I took a very powerful message from this, that it is perfectly natural to feel emotional and you shouldn't worry about how others perceive that emotion...maybe I am stretching far off here but sometimes our wishes are just that and you feel that you cannot reach what you want without taking a part of your soul and sacrificing it.

Lovely wording, really interesting write and I think everyone could take something different from this write.

You're awesome girl, and you know it :) xxxx