I wonder why.

As I have grown older, I try to think of the
reasons she walked away.
But I cant seem to think there is one good
enough, I cant seem to understand.
She wasnt there to take me shopping,
never there for even one birthday.
I used to feel it was because of me, that
some how I was the reason why.
Ive realized that was not it, I was just a
baby so that couldnt be it.
But I often wonder did it hurt her, Did
she even stop to cry?
I wonder if she has thought of me, I
wonder if she thinks of what I have
become.
Does she often wonder if things could
have been different, If she seen me
today would she know who I am?
I wonder if she see's things could have
been different, Maybe over the years
she has gained a bit of wisdom.
I wonder if she kept a photo, If she picks
it up every now and again.
I wonder if it makes her smile, If it makes
her wish she would have stayed.
She could have wrote a letter, was is so
hard to just pick up a pen?
Twenty seven years thats way to long,
to leave a daughter with not one
clue.
Obviously not caring about how she will
feel, or the questions with no answers.
The pain of seeing girls with their mothers,
and words from family not knowing if they
are true.
All I ever wanted was to see her just once,
to ask her to tell me her side.
I know Ill never know, the questions will
be without answers.
I may never know her thoughts, nor the
reason she never tried.