Weep Brown Eyes (Alouette)

by Meena Krish   Jun 7, 2013


A cycle of gloom
among wishes bloom,
pain stabs, yet within is numb
let these brown eyes weep
so it may find sleep,
why God, this unkind heart drums?

The Alouette, created by Jan Turner, consists of
two or more stanzas of 6 lines each, with the following
set rules:

Meter: 5, 5, 7, 5, 5, 7
Rhyme Scheme: a, a, b, c, c, b

    report violation
2


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Latest Comments

  • 6 years ago

    by William Mae

    I love the phrase brown eyes, I always have. You used it here so perfectly.

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Hello Meena,

    I like this form a lot, though I confess, I have never heard of it before, so excuse the ignorant!
    As to the content, how very true. Letting it out really is the only way to find any lasting peace.
    All the best, Meena,
    Ben

  • 11 years ago

    by Amreen

    So true.. Pain is such a bad feeling and to get rid of it, you need to vent it out, which can lessen it. You depicted this perfectly here and the form is just awesome and thanks for sharing info on it.

    Superb attempt!

    Keep writing:)

  • 11 years ago

    by Robert Gardiner

    Resplendent Write Meena!!!

  • 11 years ago

    by Valenttina

    I found it said so little yet I could feel so much . I can see the brown eyes.

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