My fragile heart
Is broken easily
It's brittle and very cold.
It didn't just happen to be that way
I had to go through years of pain
Just to get to this point.
People don't notice
That I'm not as happy as I come off.
Underneath my smile
Is something hidden from the public eye.
Maybe it's just something I can't explain
The fact that I'm depressed.
No that doesn't mean I'm "Sad"
Depression is far from that.
When I say I'm depressed
I mean
I feel worthless
The voices in my head scream out terrible things
Echoing throughout my head
Making me do things
To make me feel less broken.
When I say I'm depressed
I say that I feel hopeless
Helpless
Like I can't be fixed
And I'm in an uncontrollable free fall
To which the only way I can break my fall
Is to smash into the unforgiving ground.
Depression isn't as easy as it comes off as.
I didn't choose to be like this
If I could snap my fingers
And be happy and joyful
I would
But it's not that easy
Nothing seems to be easy ever.
I am stronger than the darkness
That tries to make me give up
I am above the demons
That run through my mind
The monsters
That try to control me.
Sometimes
Actually all the time
They win
But I'm trying.
