Comments : Involuntary Souvenirs

  • 11 years ago

    by Hannah Lizette

    First stanza: Oh, this opening!!! The imagery of him tracing hearts on your heart is wonderful, but the pain of remembering it hurts you so much. It was a touching moment that is burnt into your memory, your arm... that you can almost see the outlines of them still. You want to forget him, but you can't... he left such an impact on you and your life.

    Second stanza: You have to try and distract yourself daily or you will be in a world of him... that isn't healthy to do so and you know that, but eventually you find yourself finding him again.

    Third stanza: Ahhhh. I love this stanza. Scents stay with us for so long. You can smell even a hint of something and it will remind you of something/someone that you haven't seen in years. But at this moment, you are letting go... you are savoring the moment of his signature scents before you finally release the memory of him.

    Ending: Even though you are letting go, he is still in your heart, somewhere deep...but you can't continue to drag yourself down for a memory. I believe that love doesn't stop...you just love them in different ways, in stages.

    Wonderful write, girl!!! as always. <3

    • 11 years ago

      by Meme

      You really do get my poem. Thanks a lot for your comment hon :)

  • 11 years ago

    by Boy

    Very beautifully written like always. words are so sincere and true.

    my favorite stanza is

    I had caught a trace of
    his perfume in the air,
    mixed with the warmth
    of our morning coffee
    and I held on to the ache
    for one last time before
    surrendering to the overdue
    moment of letting go.

    very strong words attaching each other. i liked the combination of words your panned here. amazing.

  • 11 years ago

    by Maple Tree

    Judge Comment:

    Meme has a way of making me weep with her writings... I can't begin to explain the power of her poetry. What I admire most about this piece is the simplistic and realistic tone of a love that has passed and capturing the feelings within. Pure elegant lines through and through:

    "I had caught a trace of
    his perfume in the air,
    mixed with the warmth
    of our morning coffee
    and I held on to the ache
    for one last time before
    surrendering to the overdue
    moment of letting go"

    I like to highlight stanzas that help me decided my choices for the week, and this stanza here by Meme sealed the deal for me.. I could smell the lines of perfume and coffee and heartbreak! Powerful piece by Meme this week!