Simplicity
by Hannah Lizette Jul 2, 2013
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I've traced calligraphy in every beach |
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Latest Comments
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11 years agoby Tara Kay
Hannah, this poem, was nothing short of beautiful and I love how you used the prompt.
There's such serenity in this write and I love the use of the sea and sand, and how you said about calligraphy, that adds to the beauty of this piece
And as the cobalt sea kisses
the shore goodnight,
I realize I envy their simplicity -
^^^ this is the core of the piece and in my opinion, one of the most beautiful lines I have ever read, there was such perfection in these words. The sea and waves are so simple, graceful yet rough and that's it. There's no other confusion in what they are, and it's so true that life and love is complex.
I really loved this piece.
xx
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11 years ago
by L
That sure does, I think the poem will benefit more if it's placed under the love section then it will be easier for the reader to find that association; otherwise, at least in my case, (my brain went towards associating Poetry and calligraphy rather than the ocean and shore.
haha I thought the unanchor driftwood was the pen. lol
or may be the miscellaneous suits it as its open for more interpretations. -
11 years ago
by L
It's hard to comment on this poem, but the whole poem hinted me towards the way you write and how writers block hits you. I understood that, based on the mention of deserted island and on unanchored driftwood... I guess your pen is running away? or it has so many ideas that is hard to catch them. Either or I think it revolves around the idea of writers blocks... I can be wrong.
but that's what I understood from the first half of the poem.
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On the second half, I'm not sure if it's supposed to be about a lover or rather about your pen, but since I interpreted the first half as what I mentioned, I think the second half goes in relation to the pen and that no matter what it always there writing interesting poems like this one.
P.s. I like simplicity, but it's so hard to write simple poems packed with meaning and images. Sigh-
11 years ago
Thanks for your comment, Luce. I always look forward to them because you give a new insight of how my poetry is being interpreted. :)
I've been told many times that my poems are very hard to decipher, and this one I've been asked what is behind this poem, so I will respond to you here so you can get a better idea of what my thought process was behind this one.
My first part is really just talking about declaring my love in the sand at the beach, near the water where the sand is wet... kind of like you would doodle your name and hearts along with your lovers name.
Then the second part is more about the change in a relationship and how loneliness forms.. missing the 'goosebumps' that once were present.
and then it goes on to personify the oceans relationship with the shore... kissing it and always coming back to it no matter what... how they have a simple relationship that has a fresh start every day...and how I envy it.
---hope that gives you a better understanding! :) Thanks again for commenting!
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11 years ago
by ThebutterfliesMuse
Here to start I don't even know.
The way you use metaphors blows me way as it is my weakness haha. I see no flaws either. Now to comment.
First stanza- I love that you trace your memories backto a good place metaphoricly that was amazing. I love the beach as well so it warmed my heart.and I loved how you said hit my poetry as it is an idea you write down.
Second stanza- desert island id great use for isolated. As in you cant find words to write. You feel trapped and you want to grab ahold of anything.
Third- I think yhe best stanza because it sets up everything you want to say. The simplicity of a kiss that can go unspoken and the love the shore and the sea have.
Ending-I love how you wrap it up by being back in your lovers arms as yesterdays worries are left behind. This a great write. Good luck I hope you win the challenge 5.
