Reflection

[Judging comment for week of 7/15/13]:

I cannot "pick and choose" verses here that spoke to me because every single word did, like it left a tangible remnant of your soul. I admit that I, and maybe others, can hold back in poetry in the matters of penning our brokenness or our journey in realizing we may not have had reasons for it that others did. It's hard to be that open and reflective sometimes because we can be afraid of what others will comment, if they won't even try to understand our doubts or where we're coming from. I loved how your voice was genial, honest, heart-breaking and yet knowing you have made this realization by yourself and that no one has made it for you. Even if you are still caught in trying to cope or strive for acceptance/perfection/achievement, this is like a weight of your chest lifted it seems to just express it so outwardly in these words.

A beautiful metaphor about the souvenir! I imagined an often used, cheap toy from a park or something that a person grows about from.... that was only for temporary amusement, yet is not cherished the way you should be, the way memories should be. I like the contrast of "wedding" too, it shows that strong need for love to be shown, not just believed in.

I feel like, especially those last lines, were dipped in sorrow and an experience, real touch of life. Just like we can do good to others but we may not have that returned until much later in our life, treated poorly and not even human sometimes. But if we think "bad", whether that be terrible about others or about our own failings, we can drive ourselves crazy nit picking at the wrongs we create.

Such a "full" piece I really have no place in critiquing. Reading this poem fully in one sitting leaves you kind of speechless but I'm not sure if I'm close, just sharing my thoughts. I could probably write pages about what each line made me think and how deeply rooted it is in truths you've recognized and the footsteps left behind.

Judging comment:
"For some reason I really love when people use the word baptized in their poetry. A refresher, a rebirth, a new period in their life. Being baptized by reality is a really interesting thought, because so often we get slapped by it and brought back to the real world. This way it seemed a little more gentle. Perhaps through the reflection and this time period the character is going through, they were able to find a new birth in the reality instead of being smacked into it. I love reflection poems because I feel it's a healthy dose of therapy, and this definitely felt that way for me. I could go on and on about this piece but I will just say it's well deserving of the front page :D"

This reminds me a little bit of the discussion you and I are having/had with the verse we talked about!

Very different structure from you, it was honestly a bit hard to read for me because I usually don't give prose like this much thought. I knew it had to be good coming from you, and I wasn't disappointed.

"Every bit of information I left on flyers seemed to unpack on its own, exposed its insides like an inviting lover, only with less tender intentions"

I absolutely love this part. The whole poem makes me feel like you're trying to be more blunt than usual, this line makes me think that in particular. I really like the idea of information becoming a living thing instead of knowledge or wisdom. It's living, breathing, moving, changing people and ideas.

"All I know is that being good doesn't necessarily bring you good, but thinking bad unleashes the mad dogs of conscience"

I wish I had this idea first, lol. Good deeds don't always bring reward, but bad deeds always bring you a negative consequence. There is SOOO much truth here. I really like the way you portrayed it, such a vivid way -- unleashing the mad dogs of conscience.

A very intriguing and thought provoking piece, as always :)

NICE