Controlling the Elements

Which elements pulse inside,
Driving me towards this fate.
Cold and metallic is my heart,
Burning hot is this hate.

I thought I did it all right,
Ignoring the temptations and shame.
So busy running from the bad,
That the good just never came.

Now I am left to fend it off alone,
Feeding from my soul as it grows.
Blackening the last color in my world,
Until only this endless pain in me glows.

What is left inside,
When there's nothing there to take.
Controlled and calculated actions,
Daring my self-control to break.