Buried

I've started writing a thousand times
Only to stop myself.
I miss you and I can't express how much,
Just how much I do.

You were a massive part of my life
A massive part of me
And I can hardly breathe when I remember,
Remember how it used to be.

I recall that harsh humid night
How your loss bit at my heart.
I was numb and couldn't sleep,
Couldn't cry nor scream.

I remember when they brought you home
How very hard I cried.
I collapsed and cried out your name.
The shock came alive in me then.

We lay you down beside daddy the next morning
and I couldn't help but look back.
It was so hard to walk away,
Like someone stole my soul.

But still to this day
I can't let go nor weep.
For you're my first thought every morning
And my last before I fall asleep.

10/10/12