Unpretty

Loneliness lingers in waters,
Waters that are drowning me.
I gladly soak it all in,
My pores open, free.

My tears have created wounds,
In the dusky darkness, I bland in.
I'm plucking out old debris
Of my ancient intoxicated sins.

I'm riding in a past unknown
To close bonds and new found fears.
Hidden, damaged, branded
And I wish my lost souls lay near.

I breathe in brand new days
That are smothered in colours of grey.
The colours once bright, tainted,
Chipped now, faded away.

I bleed, bleed in the silence
Bleed cold in the dark night.
Silenced, lost in the eather
Pretty in the imaginative light.

So I lay down slowly
In the rose petal flower bed.
One made especially for me
To chase away the monsters in my head.

Cry in the deep silence
High pitched and care free.
Free from his cruel expectations,
His high expectations of me.

I finally let go,
Let go as my insecurities fade.
I will lay here until tomorrow
Until he finds the pretty mistake he made.

12/10/12