Not Today

How long before it hits?
Before it really sinks in.
It hurts like damn hell,
Is this where it begins?

I never really thought about it,
I just can't go that deep.
Don't want to go that far,
Within me, it sleeps.

I avoid it at every corner,
Swerve every turn.
I sidestep the memories,
As the truth in me burns.

It's like I can't breathe,
He took you aswell.
Is this my destiny?
Or just my constant hell?

I want to run away,
So, so far away.
Into the depths of the unknown,
Where broken hearts lay.

Maybe you'll be there,
And you can come back.
I'm sickened by this agony,
Drawn into the black.

And I long to hold you,
To touch you so much right now.
To tell you how I feel,
But I can't, somehow.

I need you, really need you,
Please don't go away.
I can't say another goodbye,
Can't see you again,
not today.

09/18/12