Gerbera

by Mahal Ko Kuya Ko   Dec 6, 2013


Lately,
I can't
get myself
to finish
every single poem
I write.

It's like
dropping
Gerbera petals-
hoping you'd
pick them up
to collect
every lost
fragments of
my diaphanous
and fragile poetry.

But you
only pick marbles
(natural or
man-made)
to make
fireplace hearths.

My innocense
always thought
that flowers
make a
poem elegant...
so I write
about them.

But this
poem is
not elegant,
this is
not comely.

You told me
that flowers
don't bring
elegance in
my poems,
instead,
they bring
false hopes.

Still,
I chose
a flower
to be
the title
of this poem.

It is
the modesty
of a Gerbera
that brings me
real hope.
It is
the scent
of Moonflowers
that taught
me how
to write.

I am
not hoping
that everything
I write
will be graceful.
But I
will continue
dropping
Gerbera petals
to show
you how
to create
hearthstones
using them.

With a fistful
of Gerbera hopes,
I started
writing this poem
and I
finished it.

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Latest Comments

  • 10 years ago

    by Beautiful Soul

    This is a very interesting poem I agree. The beautiful message is there yes. Again you write about flowers and you want them to inspire you. I think here you want to write about the fragrance of that beauty. I agree the flow is great here and here you didn't flood the poem with overused wording which makes this in my opinion one of your best poems :). Well done

  • 10 years ago

    by Sylvia

    I sort of get the message you are trying to have the reader understand but it is jumping all over the place and I sense that there might be more than one message in your words. I think I had said this before on one of your other writes, I think you could rewrite this, eliminate redundant thoughts and repeated words, shorten it up some, make it flow smoother.

  • 10 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Anything that starts never stop till you are done, for an incomplete sentence, poem or story is an incomplete life..just like life well that is how I feel.

    Though the flow is undulated I think for this write it good. For it speaks the mind rather then making it all flowery and smooth..good job :)

    Keep penning..take care.

  • 10 years ago

    by Robert

    This poem was very interesting to me.

    I have not really read a poem like this one yet, so I had to read it twice. The texture isnt bad, and the flow seemed to be ok.

    Nice write

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