It all started with a spider
It made me think of you
You said you would always protect me
I know we were joking around but it meant something to me
You know how much I hate them
Probably just as much as zombies
But I know you could never truly protect me
At least not the way I want
When I asked about it you told me you liked me
When our friend asked about it you told them you were confused
What about?
What's wrong with me?
Did I do something wrong?
Is there someone else?
There are so many questions I want to ask you
But I feel as if I've lost my voice
You don't seem to be reaching out to me
As I've been to you
It hurts
Behind the smiley and happy mask I wear I feel sad
And worthless
And angry
I don't want to be like this
But I same time I do
You gave me something no one else Will be able to give me
It filled the dark void I had been feeling for so long
As if something was missing
And then it suddenly disappeared
And I felt free
Until now
When I saw you with her it made me think of what happened
Before what happened with us
And how much it hurt you
She played you for a fool
I would never do that
I don't have the heart to break anothers
But I do have the heart to break them
Damage them
Hurt them
The way I've been feeling
Make them bleed
I often imagine myself killing her
In the most bloody and psychotic ways imaginable
Mostly with a butchers knife
My realist weapon of choice
In every image in my head you are stood there
Watching
As I make her life end
You're always telling me not to do it
But I don't listen
I continue
Like the Yandere I know I am inside
The psycho I am
The person I want to embrace with open arms but fear all the same
There are a lot of things we don't know about each other
But I want you to know all about me
Everything I've been through
Everything I Will
Every thought and feeling I've ever experienced
I want us
Even for a little while
While you're still here
Before you leave our town
Before you possibly leave me forever
It's happening so fast
Everything thing does for me
Except you
You're slow
You said we'll see where things go
But they've came to a stand still
Is it because of the others?
Is it because you're having second thoughts?
I don't like slow
Slow is boring
You told me our souls were on the same wavelength
I know what you were referring to but it was cute
I don't feel as if they are any more
Mine's travelling fast
As does everything with me
While yours seems to be travelling slow
Maybe to keep in time with someone Else's?
I don't like it
If I could I would control everything
Make it happen at my pace
But I can't
I'm no god
This isn't like an anime
Where at the heroine's lowest point her prince Will swoop in and save her
I'll be able to save myself
But not for a while
I'll do it in my own time
As I'm used to
But I want you here
To tell me it's gonna be alright
And hold me
Protect me from the things I fear
My walls are made of paper
Anyone can break them down
You've just been one of the few who have tried
But I'm gonna build them up
With something harder
But which can still be broken
Like glass
A glass wall
So I can see everyone trying to get in
And I can choose who Will make it through alive
I know I Will be happy one day
But I guess that day just isn't today
