Scattering Ashes (senryu)

The title along with the imagery you painted with just three lines brings out the image, emotion and the atmosphere all at once. The pain of it using the children is crystal clear...touching write.

This one is very clear in it's meaning for me. The title says it all as well. Scattering ashes. You pinpointed the title very well in the poem and the imagery you used is great. Your wording in nonchalant and you say the meaning without using it. That's what makes a great poem I feel. Anyways. You pinpointef the details well in the children here. It's hard to do in a short write but theemotions are heart ffelt and sad. Simply the children are at the beach/ocean and the are scattered their loved one's ashes or they have already and have come back to the same spot to remember. I loved the trembling compared to the waves. It seems like the ocean can feel the kids pain and it seems to be "comforting". The last line sums up the poem very well. Overall a great write because of the emotions you place. Well done.