Morning Hush (Haiku)
by Hellon Feb 21, 2014
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Wings of gossamer |
Did You Like This Poem?
Latest Comments
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10 years ago
by Kiko
Hellon,
This doesn't work for me on so many levels.
"Gossamer wings" is a cliche. "blushing" is a personification, which is not supposed to be used in haiku. "Butterfly kisses" is another over-used cliche. And it is also a personification, since the butterflies are not kissing anything.
There's nothing original or haiku-like in this.
Sorry to be so negative,
Remember, in a haiku you are simply describing a scene - without gussying it up with a lot of poetic devices.
Eric-
7 years ago
by mossgirl19
I think it's not so dressed up and the scene was clear at first reading. Haikus have evolved. Cliches maybe but as it had painted the scene well it suits me. :-) I do think this is lovely.
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10 years ago
by Ole Carsten
So cute and lovely
Butterfly kisses is nice -
10 years ago
by Maple Tree
This is beautiful Hellon, very pretty haiku!!
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10 years ago
Such a delicate piece, like that of this butterflies wings. Sometimes, we focus too much on the hustle and bustle of daily life that we forget the to take in the beauty of it. No wonder childhood is so magical..beautiful work.
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10 years ago
Very beautiful haiku.
