Comments : Morning Hush (Haiku)

  • 10 years ago

    by Beautiful Soul

    This is a very detailed and immense haiku hellon. I really enjoyed the image of the butterfly but you don't really know it's a butterfly until the end. But you wrote about each beauty nature holds. First the wings being gossamer being thin and frail. But in that there is colour.

    I believe the second line is my favorite because you so the image of the flower being kissed. The rose is red from the blushing but you also say the rose blushing like it is filled with love. The last line ties the poem up well. It connects the whole thing. The wings hold a butterfly and the flower is in love from the butterfly caressing it's cheek. This is such a beautiful poem :) well written

  • 10 years ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    Very beautiful haiku.

  • 10 years ago

    by Acoustic Odyssey

    Such a delicate piece, like that of this butterflies wings. Sometimes, we focus too much on the hustle and bustle of daily life that we forget the to take in the beauty of it. No wonder childhood is so magical..beautiful work.

  • 10 years ago

    by Maple Tree

    This is beautiful Hellon, very pretty haiku!!

  • 10 years ago

    by Ole Carsten

    So cute and lovely
    Butterfly kisses is nice

  • 10 years ago

    by Kiko

    Hellon,

    This doesn't work for me on so many levels.
    "Gossamer wings" is a cliche. "blushing" is a personification, which is not supposed to be used in haiku. "Butterfly kisses" is another over-used cliche. And it is also a personification, since the butterflies are not kissing anything.

    There's nothing original or haiku-like in this.

    Sorry to be so negative,

    Remember, in a haiku you are simply describing a scene - without gussying it up with a lot of poetic devices.

    Eric

    • 7 years ago

      by mossgirl19

      I think it's not so dressed up and the scene was clear at first reading. Haikus have evolved. Cliches maybe but as it had painted the scene well it suits me. :-) I do think this is lovely.