Comments : Chasing Shadows

  • 10 years ago

    by Everlasting

    Chasing shadows in the sun
    when we are not on the run

    Chasing creatures in the sun
    when we are not on the run

    I thought it was pretty cool how you used the starting lines in the first stanza, to end the poem.

    I mean they are not exactly the same words but they end in the same words and start with the same words.

    Also all of the lines have 7 syllables... the only line that I 'am not sure is this one:

    dark images may cause concern

    I'm not sure if the word "images" is two or three syllables but regardless... it doesn't matter. I enjoyed the read and the flow. As far as content, I need a little more time to fully digest it.

  • 10 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    Another too piece entered for the challenge, again I like the flow throughout and the rhyming that went on. The poem holds some deep inspiration on life and the behaviours we have that we need to change, and need to focus more on tomorrow instead of yesterday.

    Well done