Leaving Reality

I think as Darren mentions, the obvious lack of the unnecessary words/articles in this is what makes it exceptional. You really are left with a polished diamond of a piece. It's very easy to get caught up with too many words such as 'and' or 'the' as it makes
writing a piece easier - but not better.
This is a wonderful write, Meena.

All the very best,
Ben

Judges comments

Take a poem, strip away unnecessary words and you are left with this gem. It flows like a professional piece, it has the gall to rhyme, but only a hint. I love the break up of stanzas by inserting asides. The descriptive narrative is very well done with real intelligence. I love the last two lines of the final stanza. Leave a real lasting image. Great write Meena, only wish I could say more.

WOW, very intense. You had me gripping my keyboard. Jolly good show.

5/5

Wow... words well chosen n the flow is great. goodone

~ Such beautiful lines:

Light of life
yawns with grace,
earth unfurls
with diamond gaze

Last breath escapes...

- Very dreamy, Meena.