I try not to cry
while it hurts deep inside
tears roll down her cheeks
I feel them on my own.
^^
You have really opened this poem up nicely
Your words detail such vivid imagery
allowing the reader to also feel such deep emotion and feeling that cold wet tear sliding down the cheek. Very impactful!

And I try not to cry
seeing the hurt in her eyes
as she waits, all alone,
for him to phone home.
^^
I admire your flow, very easy to follow and reads well! I feel the hurt seeping through your words, it allows me the reader to reflect on times where I have seen people in sorrowful pain and it makes me sad also and I just want to wipe away all the sadness.

And I watch
as she cries,
slowly dying inside
each time he decides
to postpone the phone.
^^
It is sad when relationships dont work out the way they should and people end up suffering, I love - 'slowly dying inside' it really is a strong statement! great choice of wording!

I tell her it's ok
but I can still see
the pain in her eyes;
^^
Sometimes the words 'ok' will never seem to heal a broken heart, the wound so deeply impounded the cure so out of reach, great capturing of true pain here!

And I'm scared of the day
when she finally dies.
^^
I love how you ended with your own personal comment! truly makes this poem so much more significant

5/5