Lost love.

My fingers were trembling, and I couldn't stop my heart from racing so much. What was wrong with me! Why did I just agree to this? Everything around me felt blurry, and there was no sound being injected into my ears. I saw his mouth moving, his tears rolling down his face as I re- read his lips over and over again in my head.

"Give me a second chance."

Those were the final words he would tell me as I would agree to give him a second chance. I knew the moment I said yes that it was the wrong answer I had given. I don't give second chances and he smiled as he heard the answer his ears had been yearning for. My gut tightened, my lungs felt like they had collapsed from such pressure, and my throat felt like it was being squezed so tight. I knew something that he did not and that was that I had no longer loved him, I did not want to work on whatever it was that he was holding onto.

"Thank you so much for giving me this chance, I promise you that you will not regret it."

I nodded my head and gave him the approval that I knew he would not let me down since our fight. My body felt like I was a zombie, like I had been hungry for months. Why had I lied and gave him a chance he did not deserve, he did not even need. Inside my mind I knew that this chance was something that could break or make us, but that was the secret I kept inside my soul.

The secret was that my heart did not want to give this person a second chance because it was not what my hearted wanted anymore. He was a memory, a drawing in my mind of a time scrap booked inside my mind. The secret which would haunt me until he left me for good, I was with someone I stopped loving... and that secret had killed me inside because I was made to believe that somehow I could love him again the same way.

The secret was inside, that I could never love him again.