I look and try to see but my eyes are jaded by my past
They see only the black and blue of what has ensued and
I can see it to in you
Your eyes are blue and your heart is blue and your mind is black comparable to mine
We are two in the same hiding from the truth and concealing the feeling of being afraid
Afraid of losing you're self and others
Afraid and ascending up a hill that at times seems like a mountain all to better our self's so we climb and climb to touch the top.
But we plummet as it is to be human and we get wedged in our own spider webs at the bottom that inter twine with the blue and black and we plummet hared into our self's
I fall and I get up like they say and I only fall again and every time I fall it gets worst and Worst turns into blacker and bluer And in the end it becomes our life's a living spied in a web to which we are now so acquainted we find our self always in the blue and black
But with you I'm unabridged in a way that makes me free
My spider web is thick and has many coatings of hurt, aching, anguish and indignity
My spider web reflexes on the outside in a way that shames me beyond arguments
But with you I'm free and I'm falling out of my web into your light
My shame embraced in my pain and collapsed in the sickness around me marks me as difficult like you But with you I'm free and my web is impending down slowly and I will learn like I hope you learn that we are boundless beyond our own self doubt and pain
I hope you fall into me like I'm falling into you and together we will learn to be adequate in ourself.
For Marvin because we our both falling and learning to live.
