Comments : Stranger.

  • 10 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    Oh my goodness! For some reason I had to look twice at who wrote this, as it just does not seem like your usual writes to me.

    I think this poem runs quite deep from you, and the way you have described the inner battle you have with yourself is great, so relatable.

    I adore your opening comparing being blind to within, but only being able to see one thing on the outside. Quite clever.

    the imagery in the fireworks verse holds so much, especially the fireflies who seem to have some confidence issues and perhaps anxiety about life and the world, then the owl also adds to the night imagery,

    you then go on to explain your title, and how you become a stranger because you do not recognise yourself and what you are right now, or how you seem to be feeling.

    I shy away again,
    believing my spirit is too inanimate
    to be drafted for love.

    - this is so heart breaking to think of, to feel that someone believes this deep inside is sad, and yet we know it is felt all too often, and by too many.

    your ending is perfect for the poem, some endings are rushed and I feel disappointed, but this ending fitted just fine with the tone and meaning inside your poem, showing us what that emotion is doing to you and how you cannot seem to find a way to be involved in the world.

    Loved the layout, and the poem!
    Well done.

  • 10 years ago

    by Beautiful Soul

    I'm really glad I turned to your poems the first day I return here. The title fits perfectly with the poem. The raw emotion alone lets you feel exactly what you are. Okay I really like the first line because its hard to see someone from inside out even yourself. And that darkness does feel like a stranger a lot of times.

    The fireworks are a great contrast. And the word triumph goes well because the fireworks are the first thing you notice when you explode. And though you call out to them, no one can hear you or see you. The first fee stanzas are a nice set up. You seem to be a voice for the voiceless it seems but you cannot because you cannot even change yourself.

    The last line that repeats is great because you have a double meaning there. You turn away from the curtains which in turn makes you turn away from life as you do not like what you see. Beautiful. Nominated!