Amor Vincit Omnia, or how I F**ked up

How could it all be
That the stars don't shine for us anymore
That my mirror reflects scum of the earth
That people only take and give nevermore

As the scum speaks he speaks the truth
When he says that this isn't who he set out to be
Now a pathetic excuse for a man
Is out with a plea?

As he scattered blame, the blinded man
he was his only enemy
And for eternity,
he will be damned

How could I ever be angry with you
Now that I realize

It's too late

It is just the egregious I
The I the I the I
A narcissistic hypocrite condemned to this life
Without You, what's the point, all there is is strife

I've never been great with poems
Versification and composition
Despite the admonition
What do I have to lose now
I'm just here to spill the self-hatred

I hurt you, and broke my vow

The caring soft touch that I've neglected
and your laughter, oh god the way you laugh
There is nothing insurmountable that I wouldn't go through
to feel Your braid on my face again
Your smell, the awkwardness
The beauty, I Love You

I have not put your feeling in the first place
And tears will never be as salty
I've always postponed with a haste
The worthless loser payed costly

But,

The Last thing I'll ever do is repeat history

But the Worst thing is that I'll never be able to prove it

so the Least I could ever ask of you is for forgiveness

I sweat these words and the gloom catches up
Chest tightens and the pit grows
The scum will be nothing but a memory
Another chapter, another failure
Read and burned

Today is the day I stopped praying
Because even though I try, I'm still failing
I try harder, below what is lower that hell

A chance for redemption is the reason I haven't yet fell

And what am I supposed to do now?
Move on? Live with myself knowing
That the One person I cherish the most in this world
Has turned against me?
I deserve to see you with someone else every time I close my eyes
And my firing squad just won't stop, it aims for the stomach
I am the one to blame for this havoc
People like me should be eradicated
Gloated upon the emptiness
Mock the pity brainless

I caused nothing more than pain
A second of many chances
Was cast into abyss
You make me want to be a better man
Another chance, another kiss
Stupid dreamer surrounded by a dam
A beauty now fortified
Now I suffer for my attention span

And I just wanted to keep you safe,
But I messed up on the way.
Keeping you away from yourself,
But I had gone astray

And if the misfortune will arise again, for the last time let me be by your side.
For the last time let's set it all aflame

I'll do anything you ask me for

my Far Out Dame