The many faces of a Spoon

by Maple Tree   Aug 18, 2014


Patches of darkness
linger upon an old country
road that whispers "Coward",
or "He's going to Hell"-

What is now left behind
are pieces of a granddaughter's
broken heart, for my Papa
took his life upon a hill
with a gun and a yearning
to see Grandma again.

Society speculates on a smile
with a hidden darkness tucked
behind depressions noose.

His spirit lingers within
tumbleweed winds and his
contagious giggle as I tried
to herd cattle in his size thirteen
boots.

My love for him didn't fade
because he chose the day
and time to rest in peace,
It just made me miss him
a little sooner than expected.

Dedicated to my Grandfather
"Mr. Roy Spoon" I'll always
love you Papa-
My Grandfather suffered from Parkinson's Disease and depression.
Also dedicated to My Mother who encouraged me to write this piece, to honor her Father <3

Parkinsons disease has inflicted both sides of my family. Both of my Grandfathers and my mother and father. Yes my Grandfather took his life, but society needs to be aware of how depression can swoop in and consume your world, My parents struggle daily. This poem was written and crafted in the hopes of showing awareness.

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Latest Comments

  • 10 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Its a pity how society views depression. They don't seem to know or understand the underlying reason. A touching write of memories both happy and sad...take care.

  • 10 years ago

    by Hannah Lizette

    Oh, Andrea... I loved this piece when I read it in the Robin Williams challenge, it broke my heart and I'm truly sorry for your loss. It's a beautiful dedication to him and I'm sure he is smiling down upon you. <3

    The opening is very lovely. It speaks so true of society nowadays because people are so quick to judge. They think that people who commit suicide are cowards and are going to go straight to hell before they even know their story, their struggle. Some patches of darkness are just too dark to live with, depression takes over and all it takes is a split second decision.

    Your Papa suffered from Parkinson's disease and depression, possibly both from the PD and from losing his wife. He missed her and decided that it was his time to join her.

    I love the mention of the memory of him giggling at you trying to herd cattle in his big boots - too cute!

    No matter what, you still love him. He may have made a decision that affected you all but you don't love him any less for it... it just made you miss him sooner than you expected.

    I'm sorry to hear that your family endures so much pain with the Parkinson's disease. My Papa suffered with it, as well.

    I'm glad you wrote this and I hope many people read this and learn something new about not only depression and suicide but Parkinson's disease. <3