Love Departed

by cassie hughes   Sep 22, 2014


Falling through the bitter tears
of love's unlovely dream.
Left behind, to gather up
the shredded remnants.
Bleeding in the dark.

Spirit wounded after life
has moved along so fast.
Reeling from the sharpened
words that sliced away
each tender, loving part.

Soul's first kiss, untasted,
lies neglected in the wind.
Blowing over pallid lips
to brush away the taint
of broken heart.

Written for club prompt challenge

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Latest Comments

  • 10 years ago

    by Marvellous

    All is bound to fail us, but Truth. Until the end, win is dicey..

  • 10 years ago

    by Lune de ma vie

    Falling through the bitter tears
    of love's unlovely dream.
    Left behind, to gather up
    the shredded remnants.
    Bleeding in the dark.

    Falling through the bitter tears of love's unlovely dream. Wow, this sentence is deep. It was a ton of truth behind it, during a heartbreak. You can't escape not even in the dream state. This stanza made me feel like I was in a dream of heartache and heartbreak where this person is beaten and broken.. Alone to gather up their broken pieces but their heart continues to break and bleed unable to seek and find the pieces to connect back together.

    Spirit wounded after life
    has moved along so fast.
    Reeling from the sharpened
    words that sliced away
    each tender, loving part.

    Vivid description of the words which have been said here. These words have sliced to the bone upon this person, unable to allow a healing process to happen with their soul wounded and life has left them behind. Very somber and sad stanza.

    Soul's first kiss, untasted,
    lies neglected in the wind.
    Blowing over pallid lips
    to brush away the taint
    of broken heart.

    Strong and powerful ending. The lies have been neglected.. It seems this person doesn't want to face the facts that the person they love and their love in built upon lies, but then again how it ends it sounds as if they've come to and understood the hurt now brushing away the harm and hurt trying to regain their broken heart.

    5/5
    Lovely and deep write.