Such a hauntingly beautiful piece. with some gorgeous imagery.
'Softly, twilight's quartet
plays an evening serenade.'
Is a lovely way to bring in the musicality of the piece which not only continues in the words you use but also in the flow of those words. The whole becoming a gorgeous melody to love.
'Twilight kisses the lovely night
and midnight is born'
Another superb couple of lines, introducing a dischord into the dance as midnight tries to destroy their harmony.
A wonderful illustration of how someone can decide to wreck a relationship purely through jealousy and because they want what someone else has.
Well done. :)