Comments : Random acts of Poetry

  • 9 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    I like your use of the dashes and how they separate your stanzas... it's a bit refreshing, actually.

    It's interesting how you open up with some vagueness, about that "one day" and this "he" who I come to imagine is a past love. Really intriguing how a person can leave unrhymed, I love pondering that line! It makes me think people can leave our lives or memories can disappear and they just do, not reason or explanation.

    Only suggestion would be with punctuation here?

    "Madness,
    syntactic.
    a metre
    never met"

    - Maybe don't place a period after "syntactic" since you are continue another thought?

    Neat how you included his free verse, how soft, gentle it came. That makes me imagine when he acts and speaks freely, no filter, but it comes straight from his heart and that can be most satisfying to know/ hear.

    The second half of the poem makes me think of you coping by writing, how you meet your metaphors and write what you want or what you are called to write. That ending line also makes me think this love has influenced you, or this person affects you in a way where you are not your own, because he is a part of you still.... but I'm not sure of the interpretation?

    Thanks for the read, congrats on the win!

  • 9 years ago

    by Naughtymouse

    Conratulations on the Win!!!...Awesome Awesome write!!!

  • 9 years ago

    by Robert Gardiner

    Superlative Write, Congrats!!!

  • 9 years ago

    by Ingrid

    Dear Samia,

    Sometimes we get caught in a feeling that cannot be reasoned, nor described and emotions take us to a place without words...yet the poet in us always does try, and in your case: very eloquently:))

    Well done, well deserved win!

    xxIngrid

  • 9 years ago

    by Maple Tree

    Judging Comment:

    The title of this is wonderful, it goes along explaining this metaphoric beauty to a tee!
    This poem reads with an elegant flow and a style very uniquely on its own. It mesmerized me!
    The message is captivating and takes you on a journey of angles that can tie into scattered emotions that the writer has for someone. I really like the format...

    It's also a thought provoking piece, and takes me on a journey of heavy emotions that can lead to a writer's block that the author worked in the middle of the piece.

    Enjoyed this very much!!