Wow! I think you should listen more often to these stuff then :) We have such a master piece here.
I can already see your finger tips writing this piece.

Your structure is very strong, and your phrases so coherent.
Your May I...opening made this somehow HOT.
Then how you reflect a sense of life and birth. Gave me a scene of ice into water into the roots into the birth of something new...just like seasons. Agh how beautiful is your stanza.

And then! you take us somewhere else, I felt some current of strong love here, wanting to be somehow the dominant, the everything..

to sense without the sense.

lkjfsdznxfkjdhskjfdxhfkjdshf wonderfulllllllll.

I was really fond if your ending line, about clarity, it had abit of strength, wit.

Applause *