On My Own~

Every time you call, I'm bipolar
and start to smile, then frown
knowing that you can't do that
from up there in heaven, unless
it's my time. I wake up and curse
this earth, because you're not
here to brighten up my days, it's
the nights I eagerly await.

Even if my words don't seem to rhyme
now, know this my love: The ice that's
surrounding my heart, keeps it safe, so
when we meet again, both of you can
melt the frigidness off. The love you
bestowed upon me, left an imprint, that
never wore away, yet when winter comes
into sight, chilly air blows on my skin, like
the slight touches you tattooed on me.

If the wind whispers in your voices a "sorry"
I know I'll scream and yell.
You have nothing to beg forgiveness for.

Forever is never enough
to make up for the time we spent apart.
Knowing that you deliberately left me here on
this earth hurts yet we have the rest of
eternity baby.

Some days I start to ponder what life would've
been like, had you stayed with me alive, but
the entries on your diary
(in which you gave to me)
stitched a cloth so threadbare that scared me at times.
Babe I know, one day we'll meet again, till that time
I'll have to pretend you don't exist, so I can live my
life.