Hope in Cemeteries

I would say welcome back - but this is from a while ago S. I enjoyed the rhyming in this one. And the trust you put in someone. I am sorry it didn't work out.

excellent little piece.

You expressed here what I had felt for years. Well written

I definitely can relate. Feeling the same way right now. Great work.

Fragile first line that truly shatters the heart of the reader here. Trust is such a broken word that can mean a multitude of things. Here though you show the darker side of it and the impact it can leave us when it is broken. The first stanza sets up nicely with the rest of the poem, because you show us the plot of the poem right away and it makes us think, where could this lead, you tease us but leave enough vague lines to make us want to read more into the story.

You see all the signs but now it is too late to change what you wanted to change from the past, but I sense there is a lot of regret within this main characters insides. But this character knows now or just learned that sometimes it is our fault too. And in death we cannot change, but grow from what we did. But this stanza does a great thing to tell more of the story withinthe poem and connect to the first stanza.

The first line in the third stanza is a bit of a contrast to the first two stanza and unique I might add, because this is where the poem gets a bit dark and where this person yearns for their love but instead found the opposite of what they wanted which of course is death. The truth is revealed here and the character now knows they can't take back what has already happened. I sense here the sadness starting to seep through and take over everything.

You will remain this empty shell, this is a great line that tells me that you used to be a happy all around loving life person, but you also show how one thing can change that. In a second the whole world around you has shattered and inside you are half the man you used to be. You show the pain on the outside maybe from tears? But everyone does grieve in their own way.

The last line wraps up the poem nicely and now your life is completey shrouded in darkness and there is no light coming through. The cemetery is a great scene when it comes to sad poems and I really like how you wrote your poem around it, because for me it does work well to capture the message while showing the readers that imagery and having them keep the knowledge of the cemetery in the back of their mind. I saw no technical errors. Well crafted poem!

I like this poem. It flowed well, with the words merging into the next line effortless, and that means a lot to me. Love. I am convinced that love causes more pain and suffering than anything else in this world. Enjoyed the sad, but well written poetry.