Comments : Special note to #P&Q

  • 9 years ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    The following is your poem with my suggested edits.

    A wild river,
    runs through continents
    collecting poets' thoughts.
    Never mind the Colour of your skin,
    Language you speak
    Religion you in.
    It runs,
    Streaming with love,
    Peace,
    Courage,
    And togetherness into
    the ocean of P&Q...
    where the only thing you think of is:
    What title to give to your next poem,
    What genre to write,
    How to make new friends within and out of your poetry club.
    Together we share our thoughts:
    Pain,
    Laughter,
    sadness,
    celebrations,
    and all other happy moments.
    Together we swim,
    Forever our thoughts will remain...
    Thank you,
    wild river.
    Thank you,
    Poems and quotes..
    #P&Q.

    I think your poem is great. You have caught the reader by placing an interesting title, and shared your intimate emotions in regards to our little P&Q. It is important to realize something good when you have it, before it's too late. I have been on a hiatus from this site for years, and am only now realizing the intense healing effects such a tight-knit community can have on a person.

    The above suggestions would make your poems a bit of an easier and grammatically correct read, but it is your poem so I tried my best not to alter it to any greater extent.

    Keep writing, and if you ever need anything, you have a friend in me.

    4/5 pre-edits, but if you edit it I would mark it 5/5.

    V/r
    IdTakeABulletForYou
    (Stephen)

    • 9 years ago

      by DarkLight

      Thank you. I will take your offer.

  • 9 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Now this is a heart warming write with holds appreciation, warmth and smiles. Nicely penned :)

    • 9 years ago

      by DarkLight

      Thank you Meena. thank you.