lipstick, haloed scars, dislocated wishes -
why can't i turn you back into me again?
can't you hear my pain singing? can't you trace
my heart like you outline the lyrics of upcoming hymns?
kill these memories. how cruel i am for wishing i
never met you, no, that i ever spoke of my suffering
near gothic churches and abandoned ball fields.
waiting for your breaths in the middle of the night
to calm a disoriented mind, it made me too familiar
with your voice, the gold in your eyes a thousand
mines could never dream of.
i feel close, then like bones fractured
[everything then nothing]
would i be better off alone? so that the earth
wouldn't burn my feet when i walk the paths you
courageously crossed?
you are everything, then nothing
[to me]
and i don't know if i can always fall out of
you when your grace lifts me to new heights...
