Comments : Workshop

  • 9 years ago

    by Rachel RTVW

    Great use of metaphors! You have to understand poetry to get this, definitely worthy of a nominaion at the least!

  • 9 years ago

    by Hellon

    Honestly...this needs to be on the front page next week and...I sincerely hope to see it there.

    I have read it in two parts.. It's about a long poem that makes you feel overwhelmed to start with...will you be bored you wonder? then you get interested in the content but...alas, others are also reading and questioning the content.

    You mention Picasso in the first stanza but, towards the end my mind had wandered to Van Gough...a person also ridiculed by some. Should you have tried to include him? not sure...anyway...excellent write...

    • 9 years ago

      by Sincuna

      What a wonderful suggestion, Hell, I might even consider writing a different version with that idea. :)

      But to be honest, I don't really have a deep implication on why I placed Picasso there. It's for the shallow reason of signifying something abstract or quite hard to interpret, like his paintings... and conversely, the early stanzas of the poet's poem.

      I somewhat feel like I'm cheating poetry with this piece though. Was inspired by the film Birdman in a way. But this isn't new. Billy Collins and Stephen Dunn has written something lihe this as well, only with different purpose and sentiment.

  • 9 years ago

    by gumshuda

    Six people nominated this :p
    I'm already seeing this on the front page...

  • 9 years ago

    by Everlasting

    It should have had won this week. I have my doubts it may win for the next one but those are just doubts :P

    • 9 years ago

      by Sincuna

      I'm already glad more than 2 people have read this piece. Half kidding.

      I wrote this for poets, I think the subject of poetry is an underrated theme especially for amatuer writers such as ourselves. Though I admit in face value, the poem is a bit of a mess -- lots of fillers, primary narrator had an open ending, some might even dislike the "reader/narrator and his taste". But the content of this is so easy to write and interpret in multiple ways that it creates a lot of scapegoats. I think this poem being META (a poem talking about poetry) provides this.

      There's a lot of angles to look at, I've read this multiple times and gather different interpretations and views on each one... here's some random bits:

      - the setting of the primary narrator is inside a workshop class, possibly with college students (?) judging by the comments of the other readers/poets

      - the poem talked about in the workshop has its own story, it's narrator losing a father... the early stanzas being a bit too metaphorical or abstract that a reader can confuse shame with blame... etc

      - the narrator in the poem and the poet in the workshop who wrote it might be the same person? where's the hint? - reader finding out she's also an orphan... but is this enough, was she talking about her actual father who died with cancer or was this just a catharctic poem she wrote to cope?

      - something about the primary poem this time, at the end she mentioned about being afraid of drowing herself. This can be read in two things based on the context of what she said... she either meant she's afraid she might drown because she couldn't swim, or she's afraid she might literally drown herself, commit suicide. Hint? - read the early stanzas (picasso line), was she really ashamed (of what?) or was she infact blaming herself, that maybe she's done some wrong to her father that forcing herself to keep him alive (when he's already "broken/not functioning/vegetative state perhaps?) will just lead to her being more depressed and eventually hopeless - drown herself. Maybe the reader in the workshop was on the right of being confused with the early lines, we're not so sure of the narrator's story and sentiments...

      - another META, in the poem why are there so many commenters or readers critizing the writer (class jeering) when they probably don't understand what the writer is going through, their POV. In the primary poem, we notice the author somewhat upset or hurt that her poem was being labeled or critized, that the speaker which is herself didn't do enough. And she spoke up about it and explained why... the class went silent. But who is the wrong here. We can blame the readers/commenters for not understanding, OR we can blame the poet for not providing the explanation bluntly in the poem. - same in real life poetry don't you agree?

      there's more to ponder about which I enjoy. But I like I said to hellon, I feel like cheating. The content is so easy. It's like making a movie based on magnificent plot/book I didn't write. No matter how ugly I may direct it, the viewers can somewhat enjoy the content/story.

  • 9 years ago

    by gumshuda

    Luso.

    ..you should never have doubts...if you work and do everything to get somethingand then there emerges a small doubt in your mind...that's it...all your work will be in vain...you will not get anything....so never have doubts.
    Ihave a strong belief in the power of attraction.what one believes says does thinks dreams of...that is what they will ultimately achieve. You think you are useless you will be useless, and if you think you are awesome you will be awesome.... This is kind of the secret of life..and I believe it and have tried it and achieved it too...
    If you are in a hot pursuit to achieve something but still you have doubts that you won't achieve it..well you won't achieve it that's it...because you doubt it.

    So Never doubt anything And always aim fore the stars....the saying "aim for the stars you will at least reach the sky" in my opinion is wrong....if you aim for the stars and are confident, your will achieve and reach the stars..why should you get something less??
    The whole universe helps you to achieve something if you want to achieve it...this is the law of nature.

    P.s. Sorry ...just used your poems comment to tell some thing to luce :p

  • 9 years ago

    by Everlasting

    Sorry Aussi, I'm also replying to Purvi in your poem. Actually Purvi, I strongly believe that everyone should doubt but not doubt just to doubt and to cause harm. A positive attitude will help one reach where on wishes to get to, but if one doesn't doubt at least for a bit, we wouldn't get anywhere. We would be stucked in the same cycle. It is through the process of doubting and communicating the doubt, that our points of views become stronger and that we can achieve more clarity in life. We become more open minded. I have had doubts about doubting but oh dear doubting is a good thing If it's followed by communication.

    Though to whom to communicate the doubt, hmm... follow our intuition.

    Edit: I like the complexity of your poem Aussi. I thought I had commented on it.

  • 9 years ago

    by gumshuda

    Sweet luce,

    but do you really think doubting is always beneficial???
    I mean, if you doubt your own abilities, do you really think you'll reach anywhere...i contradict what you say....if you doubt then you'll stay stuck...because when you doubt you're own abilities you won't have the will nor the power to move forward...you'll just start losing hope if you doubt...and I guess even you know hope is the only thing along with faith that keeps you going and moving...and if you doubt these very things well then...you are not going to move ahead...
    Secondly, what if you doubt something in a relationship.umm...lets take our friendship.imagine if I doubt whether you like me or are just pretending to be my friend or you just hate me..if I doubt such things I will not trust you any more...and when there is doubt firstly,i hardly think any body comes forward and asks you and gets there doubt clarified..and secondly, if they do approach you, well they had their doubts on the beginning they still have it now no matter what your answer will be...they will more just doubt whether you were truthful to them or lying...
    Don't you think doubts create miss understandings??? And then they devastate the friendship, relationship, whatever it be....i've had friends with whom I fell out because well there were doubts...it just never mended although I tried to...
    Don't you think doubt is the basis of the betrayal of the basic human trust????
    Although I do see that you did mention followed by communication as an important factor...but look practically or maybe some past experiences, how many people communicate?? Doubt is common, communication is rare...and just asking people to communicate, you cannot get them to get back in such a way...doubts just sow the seeds of more doubts ..it is doubt that is more like a cycle...there is no end to it...
    Ummm.... That is what I really feel...

  • 9 years ago

    by gumshuda

    Mister...i assure you i'm not crazy.. :p
    Its just that me and sweet luce here have a tendency to debate in a peaceful manner most of the time...we like healthy debates...

    Oh well...i don't really remember if I told this before...but umm...awesome poem..like always :p ....no wonder I nominated it when ever I nominated it ;p t

  • 9 years ago

    by Sincuna

    Ladies, I haven't read through your comments yet (since I'm prepping up) but I assure you it's alright. It's about a debate of some sort, it's symbolic of the poem. :)