Wow, a heavy poem... this one left me speechless. The burden and weight of what you're going through is so apparent here, from depression's hold to wondering where to go from here. Sometimes, I wonder if what I am doing is right, if simply by living day to day or if I should be doing more. It made me think that while a lot is black and white with right or wrong, sometimes it's harder to decipher or plan ahead for our future, if the choices we make will be right or wrong. And I like how you repeated that line, then asking, why it seems like you are going nowhere. I've felt that too, in different ways.

I can't imagine the anger though and pain in knowing someone who has stolen others' freedom and innocence is now walking, seems to be free... that would be shattering to discover. I hope you can find peace though.

Take care!

A very powerful and honest write here, Saffie. Sometimes, it seems, true justice can only be dealt out with the most extreme violence - some people deserve nothing less.
I love the line "If the route of my heart had a gun......" - an excellent poem.