Comments : Have You Seen Me Lately

  • 9 years ago

    by ah satan 666

    @.@!!!

    Oh missy... *sighs*... Very well penned!!!
    I'll be back

    Two "to" ?

    "Don't worry about me,
    mama taught me how to
    to fix anything broken."

    5/5

  • 9 years ago

    by gumshuda

    I do I do like it

  • 9 years ago

    by Sam

    Typos: Sixth stanza, 'crowed' is supposed to be 'crowd,' I think.

    This is quite a spectacular poem. When I first read the title, it made me think that this would be a poem about where you went...like you might have lost your mind or body or something. That was just my first impression of it, which I know is completely off the charts here. Speaking of the title, should there be a question mark at the end of it? Since it does seem to be a question, albeit a rhetorical one, I thought that it should have a question mark. However, it is just a suggestion.

    I also have a problem with the category that you put this in. I think that it is more suited to be someplace else, like the life section, not the miscellaneous section. However, I don't know what section under the life section that you would put it in. I think that it is more than just 'miscellaneous' work. Thats just my opinion again though.

    I am not going to go through and direct every stanza, because I would probably be here all night. I just want to talk about the ones that I think are the most important in this piece. They are my favorite, not just because they are the beginning and the end, but because they pack the punches.

    Don't worry about me,
    I am well educated on
    how to rise after a fall.

    ^ Every one of these stanzas are thought provoking; I love them all. This one is a very good introductory stanza, because I think that it encompasses all of the others, or at least that is how I perceive it. These stanzas all mention different ways that I person might 'fall,' fall meaning failure or when something goes wrong.

    Worry about yourself,
    since memories tend
    to change into ghosts
    when they find you alone.

    ^ And this is an epic ending to an epic poem. I believe that this is so true, and I love that you thought of this. I get jealous a lot on here, because I can never come up with beautiful pieces like this. Everyone seems to be able to do so, so mine just seem blah. Anyway, it is like you are telling whoever that 'there is no need to worry about me, I have learned a lot in life, and I know how to take care of myself.' You are also telling them to worry about themselves, because some day they might regret it.

    This poem is beautiful, Meme. You have listed all of the lessons that you have learned through life here, or at least a good portion of them. These are all valuable in that they will come in handy throughout your life.

    Wonderful

    ~S

    • 9 years ago

      by Meme

      Thank you for every suggestion. Yeah, the category of the poem confused me as well, but I ended up posting it under miscellaneous!

  • 9 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Excellent and I love the last stanza. Really strong piece