Oh my goodness..i love this so much. i dont really know why but i do , I REALLY REALLY DO LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS PIECE. who knows, maybe because i am like that too...i would abandon the people i love the most before they abandon me because im just so scared if i would be able to survive it if they left me...

oh mygoodness...yes yes, i understood i relate to this horribly. i have indeed practised it too unfortunately and i right now have a really really really good friend now whom i love like hell and im just so scared that i might shut her out again so that i dont know...maybe everything you said...i even ended up telling her what i did before with my past bff...
why am i rambling?? o.O

maybe cause i just wrote my exam and trying to get distracted :P

"It's hard to admit that I miss you,
because that admission burns me
to the very core of my heart.
^
i agree its hard to admit even to ourselves that we just miss them because we know, once we admit it to ourselves it would just burn you to the core and what if you end up realizing how bad you were to that friend while shutting him/her out.

"It was tearing my soul apart
trying to believe my own lie;
that you never cared about me at all. "
^
i know the feeling, when you just keep lying to yourself and we just keep making ourselves believe the lie we keep telling just so that it becomes easier to dislike them and shut them out and forget them...

But the truth is I was terrified
because I knew you cared about me a lot.

There was something about you
that I couldn't push away,
something that made me want you to stay.
But my insecurities were screaming at me,
warning me how painful it would be
when you abandoned me.
^
oh my goodness...yes so very right..that something they have..that attractive charm that just keeps you high all the time and you feel that the world is perfect with that person around.
okay i guess i better stop writing...cause im doing nothing other than agreeing with everything you say here and im probably wasting your time to make you read through my whole crappy rambling... sorry :/

but truthfully i love this poem...awesome poem saff. i wonder if you wrote this from experience??? o.O well this poem went in my favouries. ^_^