A Dysphoric Drizzle

by JaneDoeWrites & -Choke-On-MY-Halo-   Jun 11, 2015


Her heart froze
years ago, slowly,
and ever so gently
she started to lose
the sanity that still
chained her to the
present.

"I remember
when I used to love
the sound of the rain..."
her whisper trailed off
as if she were recalling
some private,
yet painful,
memory.

"...but now,
now I hate it. It's
all his fault you know,
he knew a scarred
animal doesn't
welcome new hands
that suddenly come
reaching into sight."
she finished the
sentence with a
cold, mechanical
laugh you could
tell was forced.

Tugging at a
loose string from her
knit sweater, she finally
lit the cigarette she'd
been balancing between
shaky fingers for more
than ten minutes
before continuing,

"But I loved him
more than the sound
of rain..."

*A/N: A special thank you to Mori for collabing with me and bringing me back into writing again.*

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Latest Comments

  • 9 years ago

    by Bayan

    Wow loved it a lot

  • 9 years ago

    by Enya

    Wow this is really seamless, beautiful!

  • 9 years ago

    by Naughtymouse

    This is really amazing o.O Collabs are so cool when executed like this..... to write a piece with someone so seamlessly and with such great tempo is epic, it flows as smooth as glass and the word choices you two made are wonderful!!!

    I have to agree with all the comments but especially Meenas, it shows no evidence of being a collab when reading.

    Saved to favourites for future droooling! wonderful write guys!

  • 9 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    This shows no evidence of been a collab! The two of you have set the tone, mood and atmosphere so beautifully touching in a picture frame. The image is vivid and the flow of the write is flawless. I also like how the intro started with the rain and ended with the rain..touching.

  • 9 years ago

    by cassie hughes

    A wonderful collab with nothing to indicate that it is from two different writers. No mean feat!

    Powerful from the very begining and packed with emotion the first person point of view works so well and draws the reader in as if in conversation.

    A great write indeed :)

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