Fantasy rule

by DarkLight   Jun 15, 2015


Embraced by happiness,
joy kisses my heart.
Entangled with love affairs,
my soul suffers from the reality.
It's just a dream;
one my fantasy rule.

    report violation
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Latest Comments

  • 9 years ago

    by -Choke-On-MY-Halo-

    Second line since it's present tense it should be "kisses".

    Fourth line again it's supposed to be going with the flow should be "suffers".

    After "dream" on the fifth line I think ";" would be nice.

    Otherwise than those corrections this is a very sweet short poem. It's very loving and yet blunt on its own.

    Great read. 5/5

    - Moria Bella Knight -

    • 9 years ago

      by DarkLight

      Always happy to learn from others. Thank you.

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