Im surprised to be the first to comment but its impossible for me to read this and not.

I Really like the feel of this write, you used really nice language and descriptive writing to engage the reader and I really like the format you used.

"A reminder of love
or what use to be the laugh
prison they have
for my freedom to preserve
dying of age for nothing he deserved. "

^^^^^^Love this stanza :) Epic.
Great write

Great piece and uniquely penned. "I wrote to the sun how I rode to the moon" - that's wonderful.
All the best,
Ben