Hello Saffie,

A new poem from you. I hope you don't mind if I read through it?

The title 'Exposing the past' - this is what I like to call a 'more-ish' title. I want to read more when something is going to be revealed.

You ask me what I am still afraid of,
and I wish I had an easy explanation
to help you understand.
^
Starting with a statement gives a good introductions. Using the first tense directed at a known person, like a friend, or in this case this reader. The word 'afraid' conjures up all kinds of imagery, but more than that makes me want to read on and discover and as you state 'understand' - let's see if I do...

I'm scared of losing control and breaking down-
proving how weak I really am.
^
Wow, this is revealing and sad. I sense a mind being battered and feeling 'on the brink of collapse', or at least heading that way.

I'm scared of you leaving because you see
the true darkness that lives inside of me.
^
This sounds like a trusted confident, a partner, or good friend perhaps? I realise that these are usually one of the same. These special people spend the time to know us and we in turn trust them with our deepest secrets. We use them as a crux and lean on them in times of need. I can imagine how scared I would feel if my crux was threatened. I am sure this will not happen!

I'm scared of being scared
^
This line reminds me of the quote from,
Franklin D. Roosevelt 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.' Basically fear feeds on itself and grows. How do we stop this cycle? Understanding ourselves and self-soothing to name but two options. Another, is writing about it, and you are, and that is cathartic.

of his evil shadow again,
because I have ever felt this raw,
^
I think a slight typo here in the word 'ever' should be 'never'?
never been this exposed before.
^
Like other work of yours I have read - this male figure is dominant. This process you are going through is necessary and will enable you to move on and not keep the unhealthy inside you. I understand and can empathize.

And most of all,
I am scared of the possibility of wanting to die,
because exposing the past
will make me not want to live any more.
^
You, me, all of us have more strength that we give ourselves credit for. It is natural to fear not wanting to go on as the pain is terrible. The alternative is do nothing and let the pain fester and affect the rest of your life. Or, as you are doing, finding peace within yourself. In order to achieve this you must first be brave and face the demons. It will be worth it - I know, I am living proof!

Good work, keep it up.

((hugs))

Michael