Your loud silence

As I try to make your life easier
You make mine harder
Acting as if I have a disease
You don't want to be around me

Asking random questions
You want to settle down with me right?
Only to barely hear from you
What was the point?

Assuming that our wants are the same
Only to hold on to me
Which confuses me

You came back into my life

You told me
I love you
I miss you
I miss everything with you

Only to show me

I care but I'm not ready
I want you but I'll keep my distance
Making up any excuse

Giving me mix emotions

I want to work it out but I'll disappear here and there
I want you but I don't have time
I can't put in the effort

Continue to confusing me

Only because of your uncertainty
Forgetting who's been there for you
Pushing away a loyal person
You might need the next day

Making me feel like I'm not good enough
I'm not beautiful enough
Almost dictating who I am

Then I opened my eyes
I realized I'm wasting positive energy
Life is too short
So I made a choice

I'm staying happy

If you want me
you would have been made it happen
If you want to see me
You would have found a reason

You would have made an effort
You would have made it happen
But as always there was an excuse

You made your decisions

Take me for granted
Treating me like a stranger
So I gave you an ultimatum

Me or leave me be

Then I received your answer
Without a whisper
Or words leaving your lips

Something bittersweet
This pain is a blessing
Almost close to a good feeling
As heartbreaking as it felt

Your silence was the key
The answer to my new beginning