Comments : Suicide Hour

  • 9 years ago

    by BeautifulSoul

    My world feels like it's filled with secrets
    which are crushing my dreams,
    and I can't easily hide this explosive feeling
    inside any longer.

    ^ In life we all go through emotional struggles, it is a part of life, its hard to keep our secrets when we have no one to tell, we always want to let our feelings out somehow. I love the world explosive used here as well. Sadness and anger go well together. And when they are mixed together they can cause a lot of problems. Sad but true.

    My tears lie, hiding everything away;
    everything I'm too ashamed to face.

    I lost my self esteem as I let it burn,
    watching it go up in flames,
    becoming trapped in space.

    This two stanzas work well with the first and together. You always want to show our feelings, but when you have been through so much, our tears we are embarrassed about. That seems to be the case with depression and depression always lowers self esteem. Too often we blame ourselves though it is really not our fault, and that blame adds fuel to that fire that burns your self esteem. n.

    I carried the weight of the world
    on my shoulders for too long,
    but now the stars are blinding
    on this suicide hour,
    where darkness will never find me now,

    as I become another angel in the ground...

    forever free to dream.

    ^ oh wow this is such a beautiful and twisted ending that you wouldn't expect. When the weight of the world is on our shoulder we often think it is too much to handle and think about suicide. Often when we think about suicide we want to end our pain and that truly sets us free, overall this poem was great to read, it stays well with what you wanted to say. 5/5