All In Vain

by Sarwar Ferrarri   Oct 27, 2015


Would It Come Rain on me.....?
For You Left Me So Strong. ...
Yet Vulnerable to Fever Hay
And I Won't Even Fall....
As I Came Down The Fifty Stairs.....
Counting In Estate Below my Feet
As it Faints against my Pain...
And All the Things that Bothers Me
That Leaves No Stones Unturned
To Make me go Drunk-Shit Insane
I Try to get All Things Right
But All This Strive Is All In Vain

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Latest Comments

  • 9 years ago

    by Greeter

    You write pretty good. My only complain or rather critique would be the capitalization of the initial letter in some of the words. It's distracting and can make the reader stop and not read the poem.

    This way is friendlier to the reader and to my eyes. :)

    Would it come rain on me.....?
    For you left me so strong. ...
    Yet vulnerable to fever hay
    And I won't even fall....
    As I came down the fifty stairs.....
    Counting in estate below my feet

    Thank you for sharing.

    • 9 years ago

      by Sarwar Ferrarri

      I am a new writer.... and surely i would consider your suggestion....thanks for it...