Hello Brenda,

This poem is close to you. The subject matter so personal that summing up the way you feel in words, must have been hard. I can imagine the waste paper basket of attempts overflowing. And yet, here you have achieved those all important words...

Daddy were you cold
laying upon that mountainside?
Or did you lay in a patch
of forget-me-nots
with clouds drifting by?
^
This first section, a question from your 7 year old self perhaps? I can sympathise for her/ you; wanting/ wishing that his last moments were surrounded by flowers, forget-me-nots very symbolic - never will I forget! The image of a man laying on soft flowers, watching a blue sky with pure white clouds gently rolling by is serene and a place perfect in a sense to pass onto another world. Lovely!

Was death kind to you-
allowing a peaceful end-
or was it violent, and raw,
snatching your life away?
^
This following section slaps away the serene scene and reminds the reader (me) that there was violence, and the untimely death was too soon. The word 'snatching' suggest an evil hand robbing a precious life away. Thoughts of 'its not fair' and 'why him' are left hanging in the air still to this day (raw)

I hold such fascination
to the winged creature that took
your life.
marvel at its raw power-
the way it claws at the sky.
^
I can imagine every time you see a helicopter' thoughts take you back to your 7 year old self, the twinge of pain there still. The animosity alive, not seeing a mechanical machine, more a creature, like a fire breathing dragon. Despite the 'raw' feelings, this power up in the air, 'clawing at the sky'

I think of you...
so full of promise and life
and of forget-me-nots
and mountainsides....
^
This final section brings the thoughts back to the mountainside; that serene scene where he lays on soft scented flowers, looking up at fluffy clouds as he drifts into them - always to be there in the sky whenever you look for him - he'll be there.

Brenda, this is beautiful and I hope it helped writing this down. Thank you for sharing.

Take care,

Michael

Michael, thank you so much! Yes, it was a hard poem to write, a lot of emotions ran through me during this. I did invoke my 7 yr old self to bring back all those feelings. I always hold on to the hope that his death was quick. Thanks again! Brenda

Brenda

This poem put a firm lump in my throat and is as emotional a poem that I have read on this site.
I can understand that this is something that you must live with everyday and the images that you create in this are vivid and hard to read; goodness knows how hard they must have been to write.
It isn't for me to say, and I'm sure you have been told the same many times through the years, but it was almost certainly a quick passing, although I understand how little comfort that would bring to anyone. It must have been awful for you and your family.
However, I bet he would be proud of his girl for being able to convey her emotions in such a moving and emotional way.

Stay well, Brenda and all the best
Ben

This is very emotional and it wasn't easy to write this poem. But you did and thank you for sharing. I was devastating for you and your family and the way he passed away but I am sure he is with you every day and every step of the way. Take care

Hi Brenda,

I can see your 7 year old self next to you now asking these unanswered question because as life as gone on it's been hard. You have dealt with it but in your own way, it's never easy to deal with someone's passing especially one that's so close.

I can feel the raw emotion in this piece and it brought a tear to my eye. Living with this everyday must have been so difficult but it's made you grow as a person and more than likely as a writer.

Take care, Em