Jesus

Hi sir, it's a bit late but I still had a comment for you from judging the weekly contest:

"The starting line is a bit staggering, and I'm not sure if I mean this as a good thing or a bad thing, as full caps often give the impression of shouting. I'm not sure what the purpose of this line is, but moving on, I was pleased with what I read. The language is simple but the structure effectively builds up the right tension. I was attracted by phrases such as "the fog sets the silence in my hands" or "the time has melted away like water in the sea" (even though I think evaporate would make more sense than melting). All the imagery is tied well with elements of nature, of the sky, and I love how in the end this was concluded with the sun. Loved the ending usage of "zenith", it adds the last necessary bang without trying to be over-sophisticated. The balance of diction is nicely done in this poem."

Whew, this poem got to me. As it being Passion week and Good Friday coming up (and Tyler Perry's live musical aired recently), a lot of emotions come up. Especially knowing in a way, we all crucified or condemned Jesus. To write this in his eyes is very powerful. And the mention of the women weeping, as well as time itself.

Keep writing!

I love the layout of this piece. Powerful, intriguing and beautifully serene.
Well done