Numb

With tears flowing I now do come,
with eyes red from sorrow.
I planted all my wicked seeds,
And now it's the season to grow.

My tears just seem to feed my fears,
With every drop that falls.
My heart is weighted down with pain,
And I can't break through these walls.

I feel I'm trapped in misery,
And feel so all alone.
I feel my life has no purpose,
Forever alone I'll roam.

Sins haunt me in the day and night,
The guilt it weighs me down.
Like a prisoner that is sentenced,
My joy is broken and bound.

The thoughts of what if I did this,
Or tried another way.
What if I loved you like you deserved,
Then would you, could you please stay?

I broke what I loved about you,
I shattered all your dreams.
I killed whatever love that you had,
And tore your heart from its seams.

I want and I do need you,
Deserve you, I do not.
I can't go forward and I can't go back,
My heart will die of rot.

I'll love you till forever,
No matter what may come.
It won't matter if I am old and gray,
I'll hope till my body lays numb.