Tears in my coffee (Pensee)

by Mr. Darcy   Apr 29, 2016


My heart
broke the moment
I saw you both hand in hand
walking past the cafe window
where we shared our first kiss

michael
2016

Inspired by GB 'Frankesteinism' (Pensee)

Pensee

A syllabic form.
No meter specified.
No rhyme.

syllabic count 2-4-7-8-6;
line 1 is the subject;
line 2 gives description;
line 3, action;
line 4, the setting;
line 5, final thought.

4


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Latest Comments

  • 8 years ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    Michael this is amazing wow I love the format and everything. It can take us by surprise seeing someone we once were close with holding hands with someone else. Take care

  • 8 years ago

    by GB

    Hi Michael,

    I see you did great job with this form, very elegantly worded, despite the sad scene.

    Your poetry forms will always be a great resource on P&Q.
    Thank you for the mention, a real pleasure :)

  • 8 years ago

    by Rsan

    A very relatable piece..and so delicately written

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Hello Michael

    I read that poem by Samia and I had never heard of the form but it's a nice, neat one, isn't it?
    You have - I presume! - executed it very well here and the sadness is tangible; love really can rip your heart out when dealing with you like this!

    Take care and all the best,
    Ben

  • 8 years ago

    by Brenda

    Ouch, nothing worse than your previous love strolling by with their new love-beautifully written Michael-