Comments : The flowering Heart.

  • 8 years ago

    by Em

    Shanky, a truly beautiful piece from the heart. It may be simple to love but to fall in love is a truly different matter and is really hard but can be a simply wonderful feeling when it's with the right person.

    She is my inner voice
    my utmost warmth,
    She makes me smile
    even when far miles.
    ^^
    This is a lovely opening because this person even though miles away is portrayed as your inner voice so she is like your subconscious mind and also makes you smile which is always a good thing.

    Challenged,
    by the building up feelings,
    love,
    my heart she is winning..
    ^^
    You may be challenged but you have decided to take a chance and when we take chances we cannot regret them because at least it's better than the what ifs and should have beens.. It's like your a challenge because she is winning your heart, you are not handing it out. If that makes any sense.
    'By the building up feelings' I think 'of' is missing before the word feelings.

    And
    ^^
    I feel this was used intentionally to link the last line but that it keeps the reader guessing as to what's coming.

    I just hope she knows it.
    ^^
    This is a beautiful ending and I hope she does know it if not too you can always show her.

    Great little piece, Em

  • 8 years ago

    by Lyn Love and Hopes

    My vote..

    "She is my inner voice
    my utmost warmth,
    She makes me smile
    even when far miles."

    i really love this stanza.