A letter to my past self.

by Cate Rock   May 4, 2016


Did you know.

Did you know little one?
Did you know I would return?
Did you know that I would come?
Do you know what I learned?

Years have passed us.
I'm a thousand miles away.
I'm free, I'm happy.
And I'm going to stay that way!

I'm married, I'm whole.
I have a son now; he's Joe.

I help children,
Just like we used to be.
Hurt, abandoned, scared...
and I teach them now how to be free.

I teach them to cook,
I teach them to grow.
I watch as they mature.
A pleasure very few know!

You are still sad.
You still make mistakes.
But in the end you are good.
And to help them you do what ever it takes.

Your poetry still sucks.
Your words are still cluttered in your head.
All isn't perfect.
But you at least can get out of bed.

You struggle at first.
Your wings are too tired to soar.
Your roots keep you planted.
But your chains aren't there anymore.

Did you know grandpa Joseph?
I bet you remember how he was so friendly.
He lives on through his great grandson.
His name, our son, is Joseph McKinley.

The world is so large,
and you've changed so much.
It's been a rollercoaster...
But it's hearts here that you've touched.

These are the reasons...
My little dove.
The reasons to live.
The reasons to raise above.

So much love to give,
So much pain you've taken.
All of this world is waiting.
Your foundation is never shaken.

You grew up little girl.
You survived it all.
Take this message and show them your call.

My call back to the past.
I tell you dear it won't last.

Pain sinks and flat lines.
And you will survive.
Keep your head above water.
And wait for you ship to arrive.

Because you make it out of Alabama.
You see the world.

You meet a man and marry for true love.
You have a darling boy little dove.

You have a reason to live.
A reason to thrive.
Open your heart...
And close your eyes.

Take a leap of fate and trust me now.
You make it out of nowhere.
A calling and a life here is what you've found.

Put down the knife.
Wipe all those tears.
It doesn't take forever.
You'll be happy in a few short years.

Breathe deep.
Stay strong.
I love you.

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