Comments : Dreams Do Come True

  • 8 years ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    Thank you for that, I am in your debt! Now, I must say this poem is beautiful. As I said, it was posted in the sad poems section but I still held out a little hope that it might have a happy ending. Unfortunately, I suppose, life does not work that way. The full circle ending was definitely a solidly done.

    A small suggestion I would make would be:

    To mirror the lines:
    "in your chest..
    .. in my chest.."
    I would make
    "I felt it,
    felt you."
    appear as such:
    "I felt it..
    ..felt you. "

    It adds a bit of consistency, I think.

    I'd also like to say that I'm sorry for your loss, and if you ever need anyone to talk to, I'm just a message away.

    Much love,
    5/5
    IdTakeABulletForYou

  • 8 years ago

    by Em

    Wow.
    Firstly I'd like to say sorry for your loss and secondly I'd like to say that you brought me to tears because your words were so simple but so very delicately and beautifully written.

    I love how you repeat some of the lines because you are trying to get round what happened and it's Ike real life events stuttering trying to get your head around it.

    All the best, Em

  • 8 years ago

    by Brenda

    My condolences to you for your loss. This is such a beautiful write, I hope your friend has indeed found what they were searching for. Well done, take care-Brenda

  • 7 years ago

    by CJ Maleney

    So so sad, .my thoughts are with you and the family of your friend.

  • 7 years ago

    by ddavidd

    I really enjoyed this piece. I was a witness of the paradoxical painting that you draw.